We have dropped our guard and allowed bumbling idiots to rise to the top.

Georgia Congressman Hank Johnson announced stentorously during an Armed Services Committee hearing that the island of Guam is in danger of tipping over because one side of the island was becoming over-populated.

The Colorado Department of Higher Education keeps trying to enforce licensing and oversight of yoga instructors. At exactly the same time, Colorado Senator Kevin Lundberg was pushing to eliminate licensing and oversight for small day cares. Kids are tougher than they look.

Representative Steve Stockman of Texas tried to block federal funding for schools that punish children who play with imaginary weapons.

House Speaker John Boehner said that he and his fellow Congressmen “ought to be judged on how many laws we repeal.” There’s an intelligent path to making America great again.

Senator Thom Tillis of North Carolina tried to make bathroom hand-washing optional for restaurant employees, eliminating an entire level of intrusive bureaucratic oversight. “It should be the employee’s choice, not a government mandate.”

Nevada assemblyman, Jim Wheeler is so supportive of American values that he said he would vote to allow slavery if his constituents wanted him to do.

When someone pointed out to Senator Rand Paul that he had plagiarized large portions of his speeches from “Gattaca” and “Stand and Deliver” he called them “hacks and haters” and challenged them to a duel, adding quickly that dueling was unfortunately illegal since our third vice-president, Aaron Burr killed Alexander Hamilton in a duel back in 1804. Political duels were a pastime that sadly never caught on.

Representative Joe Barton, another Texan and former chairman of the House Energy and Commerce Committee denied man-made climate change, explaining that we know global warming is a hoax because the Great Flood in the Bible obviously wasn’t caused by burning fossil fuel. He also admitted the eight years fighting Obamacare had been a fantasy because everyone knew they’d never get past a veto.

Georgia Congressman, Paul Broun, sits on the United States House Committee on Science, Space, and Technology. He believes the world is 9,000 years old and that evolution and the big bang theory are “lies straight from the pit of Hell, lies to keep me and all the folks who are taught that from understanding that they need a savior.”

American students’ science scores have slipped to 20th internationally. The Colorado Board of Education’s solution was to drop science from state requirements.

Representative Louie Gohmert, also of Texas, has said that gun control leads to bestiality, pipelines are good for wildlife, radical Islamists are disguising themselves as Hispanics and sneaking across the Mexican border, and best of all: liberal elites are culling the earth’s population through vaccines to preserve the natural resources for themselves. No, seriously, he says all that. U-tube, watch his lips.

Senator Tim Neville of Littleton claims the government has stepped up its attack on parents’ rights, so he wants to make it easier for parents to opt their kids out of vaccines along with dozens of other parent/student rights while setting up procedures for implementation and grievance panels. Colorado teachers can easily do that in the time saved by not teaching science.

Is this the best we got?