Now that it’s here we are going to have to face it. COVID-19, which causes the Coronavirus (CV) has apparently been traced to social situations in Aspen and if any of those people doubled dipped their chips or handled the escalator banister we could all get the bug. Especially if we touch our faces, which we all do.

“We are aware of a confirmed COVID-19 case in Australia with ties to the Aspen community. One woman in her 20s who was visiting Aspen returned home to Australia earlier this week, where she tested positive for COVID-19,” says a dispatch from the state health department.

I don’t know about you but I have been taking extra precautions to avoid CV but it’s really the other guy I’m worried about. Resorts are global melting pots … great place to meet people and heir faces. Over the decades living the resort life I have been exposed to and exposed myself to quite a variety of humanity from all over the globe.

It’s only natural that they bring with them their pathogens, poxes and plagues. We do they same when we visit exotic foreign locations and start touching our faces. (I just touched my face … my nose was itchy). Did you know that we all have face mites? Disgusting but true.

A friend of mine just told me that CV is a “hoax, overblown by the media.” Then she touched her face.

CV is special. It’s highly contagious, obviously. Li Wenliang, the 34-year-old Chinese doctor that blew the whistle on it in China is dead and even the Pope apparently has a “cold.” A quarter of Italy’s population is on lock down and they just cancelled South by Southwest. I don’t think it’s a hoax.

So what am I doing? I’m leaving for Mexico through DIA today, of course. I’m headed for Tulum, the heart of Corona Country (CC). It’s got to be safer than living the resort life.

Despite mostly laying low in my bungalow lately I did partake in a few high-risk resort experiences this past weekend. First I went to the movies where I opened the door, bought a ticket, bought popcorn and touched my face. I did wipe down my theater seat with a bleach wipe but just after that a fat dude wiped past me with his butt in my face while he headed for his seat. I need bleach mist!

After that I went into the hottest zone of all—the bowling alley. I washed my hands first, picked out a couple of fourteen-pound balls and wiped them down with a fresh bleach wipe. I looked around and I realized it was hopeless to resist. I probably should have just picked up those heavy balls and wiped them across my forehead face mites because the results would likely be the same.

The runny-nosed kids in the adjacent alley were eating pizza, chicken wings and hot pretzels. The whole family was. And then those same kids were handling all the balls coming out of the ball dispenser. There was no avoiding sharing those droplets that the CDC keeps talking about.

Later I went to another hot zone, the supermarket. Just to remind me that there were people in the store from all over I heard several different languages from all around the world and several domestic accents from different regions of the US. The produce section is probably the scariest part of the market but the whole store has potential to foster fester.

Who hasn’t picked up and rejected a melon, a tomato or red hot chili pepper? Everyone does it and in resort markets those grubby fingers come from far and wide and have touched all kinds of exotic faces. You could launch a worldwide epidemic from any high-end resort market in the country.

They say the best thing to do to keep from getting CV is to be young, stay back from people and to wash your hands like a surgeon and not touch your face. That’s hard to do if you ride the gondola.

Luckily for most resort dwellers we have been exposed to all kinds of drastic parasites and germs already and they have helped us build strength and fortitude. That which does not kill us surely makes us stronger. If that’s true the least hygienic among us is the safest. We mountain people are generally in better shape than those down the hill so maybe we will spread but survive CV. If it’s already swishing around the Aspen social scene we can be sure that money alone provides no protection.

Despite waiting for Mother Nature to sneeze off half the human race at any moment, Steve Skinner wishes you well and will hopefully toast your health with a cold Corona on the shores of CC. Reach him at nigel@sopris.net.